How's that for a slice of fried gold?
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Rating System
Our not-quite-normal rating system that we use for every movie.
Steaming Piles of Garbage
These are movies that are rated a 1 or a 2. They have no redeeming qualities. Steer clear of these. We won't even let you know where to watch them.
Hard Dog Shit
These are movies that are rated a 3 or close to a 4. They have some redeeming qualities, maybe a quality murder scene or two. Probably not worth your time.
Freshly Prepared Bull Penis
It's like you're visiting somewhere new and want to try something cultural and different and they plot a bull penis on your plate. You'll eat it, begrudgingly. These are the 4-5's.
Moderately Satisfying Salad
Like you're out to eat with friends and you order a salad to be healthy but your friend gets the best looking burger you've ever seen. Your salad has no dressing. These are the 6's.
Delicious French Fry
Straight out of the fryer and perfectly seasoned. These movies satisfy but don't have the special qualities that would bring it higher than an 8.
Slice of Fried Gold
The holy grail of movies. Almost perfect 9's and perfect 10's. If you haven't seen the ones that are a slice of fried gold, close this webpage and go enjoy.