Horror Blog

House of Darkness (2022)

We start out with red text on a creepy background and [ominous piano playing] according to the subtitles. The opening does a good job at setting the tone of what's to come. You know what also does a good job from the beginning? Justin Long being Justin Long. The semi-awkward very-Justin Long conversation from the get makes me feel right at home.
Hap (Justin Long) drives home pretty girl Mina (Kate Bosworth) after a night out with a few drinks. She invites him inside her castle-like home and he's surprised by the gesture. Soon enough, Mina makes you more uncomfortable than the awkward conversations and nervous laughter. 
The first half is a 45-minute slow burn but entertaining watch of uneasy moments that make you feel on edge and uncomfortable. These two don't even know each other's names until 30 minutes in. The second half is still a 45-minute slow burn, but you feel a little bit more annoyed.
You start getting the feeling that something supernatural is occurring but you aren't sure what. Could be ghosts, werewolves, vampires, trolls, who knows. All you know is something is ~off~. Until you definitely know. I don't mean to victim blame, but homie should have seen this bad shit coming from a mile away.
Justin Long really carries the weight of this movie on his shoulders, as the other actresses leave much to be desired. It's filmed well, has decent sound editing, and is just predictable enough. Worth the watch? Meh, go watch Tusk instead.
First 85 minutes: 4/10
The payoff: 2/10
Ongoing awkward dialogue: 3/10
Last 4 minutes: 6/10
Justin Long: 7/10
Overall rating: 4/10

Where can you watch?

As of this post:
IMDB: 4.7/10
Rotten Tomatoes: 59%